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My Husband Hates Valentine’s Day, And I Love Him For That!

January 22, 2014 by Jenny 16 Comments

My Husband Hates Valentine's Day, And I Love Him For That!  A new series on creating the marriage that you want every day, not just one day a year!

Valentine’s Day is less than one month away!  It’s a day that society and the media tells us should be full of love, romance, chocolate, and passion…  Is that how Valentine’s Day is for you?  I will admit, I really like the concept of Valentine’s Day.  I love pink, chocolate, flowers, jewelry, and of course, romance.

The first year my husband and I were dating, he informed me he despises Valentine’s Day.  I was aghast!  Honestly, I was really disappointed and more than a little hurt as well.  How could anyone despise the day of love?  Didn’t he love me enough to want to spoil me on Valentine’s Day?

The longer we have been together, I have started to really understand why Jason hates Valentine’s Day.  It’s not because he’s against flowers, love, passion or even my obsession with chocolate!  In fact, it’s actually the opposite, which makes me love him even more.

The meaning behind Valentine’s Day is one that all couples should aim for in their relationships.  We should honor and love our significant others.  We should treat each other with small gifts and tokens of appreciation.  We should celebrate the love that we have for each other.  We should go out on a date and engage in conversation.  We should treat one another with mutual respect.  We should be intentional!

However, shouldn’t that be something that we do on a regular basis, not just once a year?   Shouldn’t we celebrate our spouse because we want to?  Shouldn’t it because we love him?  Should it be because it is a day marked on the calendar that tells us if we don’t our marriage is doomed, we suck as a spouse, or that we don’t love our spouse at all?  My goal for you is to have a marriage that rocks, not a rocky marriage!

Jason surprises me with “gifts” all of the time.  They may not be wrapped or even all that exciting, but they are the gifts that really warm my heart.  One gift he is always willing to give is going to get a pizza when I’m exhausted and don’t want to cook.  It’s holding my hand on the airplane when we take off and I’m nervous. (I’m fine as soon as we are off the ground!)   It’s gassing up my car when it’s cold outside or telling me that I’m a great cook when the kids refuse to eat what I make for supper.  These are the gifts that make a difference in my life.  (And yes, I have received flowers, jewelry, and the “traditional” Valentine’s Day gifts as well, but the daily gifts are the ones that I truly treasure the most!)

For the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing ways to celebrate the love you have for your husband.  There will be little ideas of things you can do for him, ways to grow as a couple, and other topics relating to growing and being intentional in your marriage.  Why celebrate your love one day a year, when you can be intentional and have EACH day be a day where you share your love for one another, grow together, and have the romantic relationship that the media tries to sell us every year for one day only?

I hope you will be joining me on this journey.  If you aren’t in a relationship, some of these tips will still apply to you, stick with me, there will be other posts during these few weeks as well.  Part of being a healthy person is loving yourself and those around you and you can apply some of the tips in that regard.

Filed Under: Marriage

Comments

  1. Lisa says

    January 23, 2014 at 6:55 AM

    I love your insight in this post. ” Why celebrate your love one day a year, when you can be intentional and have EACH day be a day where you share your love for one another…?” Amen!

    Reply
  2. Shannen says

    January 23, 2014 at 9:09 AM

    Yes! We do not participate in Valentine’s Day either (though our wedding anniversary happens to be two days before V Day, so we admittedly take advantage of deals on Groupon surrounding it). It’s important to show affection throughout the year, and not just on socially-expected holidays. Great post!

    Reply
  3. Susie@homemaker-mom.com says

    January 23, 2014 at 7:48 PM

    I am so happy to hear of someone else with this perspective! Its exactly how my husband feels so he & I do not celebrate it. We do all year !

    Reply
  4. Susie@homemaker-mom.com says

    January 23, 2014 at 7:48 PM

    I forgot to add I found you via the homemaking blog party! I would love your visit soon at The Homemakers Journey Blog

    Reply
  5. Shannon @ Of The Hearth says

    January 24, 2014 at 9:38 AM

    I agree that we should do things that show love for our spouses all the time, not just on a special holiday. However, I do appreciate that Valentine’s Day provides a cue or a reminder to do this.

    Reply
    • Jenny says

      January 24, 2014 at 4:23 PM

      Oh I agree! I still love Valentine’s Day and my husband does bless me with gifts. I appreciate the other days more though because there is no cue to do it, it’s purely out of love for me. 🙂

      Reply
  6. Mel Caldicott says

    January 27, 2014 at 5:00 AM

    Jenny, this is a great encouragement. We don’t do Valentine’s Day either, for similar reasons. So many of the sentiments and special days are hijacked by retailers and become all about money. Yet, love is so much more profound than this. Save the romance for when the prices aren’t inflated by a date on the calendar!
    Thanks for sharing at Essential Fridays.
    Blessings
    Mel from Essential Thing Devotions

    Reply
  7. Debi and Charly @ Adorned From Above says

    January 27, 2014 at 7:56 PM

    Thanks so much for sharing at Wednesday’s Adorned From Above Link Party.
    Debi and Charly

    Reply
  8. jackie says

    January 28, 2014 at 12:07 AM

    Jenny my husband hates Valentines day and I love him for it too!!!

    Reply
  9. Kim says

    January 30, 2014 at 10:13 AM

    Yes, yes, yes! I have felt like that for years. Just this year though, I wrote my Valentine’s Day post and had a revelation.

    I was gathering posts from men who had written about the holiday. One of them confessed he wasn’t a big fan, but that “It’s a great day to show my wife she is still My Valentine!”

    That really hit me. My hubbie and I do stuff all year round as you note, but why not go bigger sometimes? 🙂

    Reply
    • Jenny says

      January 30, 2014 at 12:52 PM

      We still do gifts too, I just appreciate the other ones more because he doesn’t feel like he has to. I love the quote you shared! 🙂 Thanks for visiting and please come back!

      Reply
  10. Elizabeth Ours says

    January 30, 2014 at 3:58 PM

    This is an excellent post. My husband is probably a bit more of the romantic, while I am a bit more the practical one! 🙂 He also has gift giving as one of his top love languages, so while I”d be content to let Valentines pass by without gifts (or buy something on the 15th at 50% off), this approach hurts my husband. So, I’m looking forward to your suggestions of ways to make our husband feel loved this Valentine’s Day! 🙂

    Thanks for linking up to Marriage Monday!

    Reply
  11. Shannon - AKA Design / Bloggers & Brands says

    February 1, 2014 at 5:19 PM

    What a wonderful idea – we don’t “do” Valentine’s Day. Thank you for linking up to the Weekend re-Treat Link Party!
    xo,
    Shannon
    http://www.akadesign.ca
    http://www.bloggersandbrands.net

    Reply
  12. Heather @ My Overflowing Cup says

    January 1, 2015 at 5:48 PM

    I couldn’t agree more, Jenny. We like to think that we treat each other like every day is Valentine’s Day. Not that we do flower and chocolate and cards daily, but that we show love and appreciation for each other daily. Thanks for sharing your and your husband’s perspective on this. I think it is wonderful! Blessings.

    Reply
  13. Tori says

    January 5, 2016 at 8:38 AM

    My husband actually loves Valentine’s day… it is me who hates it. I always tell him not to buy me a thing and please do not contribute to retailers making money from us. My husband loves me HARD ALL YEAR LONG and I refuse to let him get sucked into one day of high priced roses, chocolates… both of which I do not prefer. Men have it tough…. hopefully, they have wives who agree that it’s not one day that matters.. but all year long.

    Reply
    • Jenny says

      January 5, 2016 at 10:39 AM

      We are lucky to have good men :). Don’t forget to let him know!

      Reply

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Hello! I’m Jenny!

I'm a wife, a mom of 6 and daughter of the King. I love my chocolate, cute cloth diapers, DIY and self-improvement projects, and curling up with a great book!

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